When we get caught up in the mayhem of wedding planning, the wedding day can start to seem like the be-all end-all! However, it's the marriage that comes after that is truly magical, memorable, and at times a bit challenging. I was so beyond excited to get married last year that I didn't prepare myself as well for what was to come after. Now it's been almost a year (OMG) since that fabulous evening and my husband and I have learned lesson after lesson! I wanted to walk you through a few of the milestones that WE have come across, but of course every couple is different!
Establishing a Routine
If you're like me, you and your partner already lived together before tying the knot. However, living together as husband and wife can be a little bit different! Now that "what's mine is his," and vice versa, we have found ourselves establishing our marital roles in some ways, and sharing the responsibility in others. It's important to keep talking about these things as you go (who is responsible for walking the dog, doing the dishes, etc), otherwise one of you may end up feeling like they have taken on the brunt of the work!
Sharing, or Not Sharing, a Bank Account
My husband and I have been together since we were 15 and got married at 22, so needless to say we didn't have much in the way of assets when we became a married couple. For us, sharing a bank account was the obvious and easy answer, but for others (especially those on their second marriages) this isn't the case! You have to decide early on what you are comfortable with and establish a budget of sorts so that the money fight doesn't creep into your household!
"The Talk," aka Kids
Before you get married, you should have A LOT of big discussions, one of the biggest being whether or not you want to have children! Although my husband and I were on the same page before we got married, it has been important for us to keep checking in with each other on where we are as far as wanting children. Once you are married, you may find that your timeline for kids speeds up, especially once you ARE settled into your routine as a married couple.
Saving for a Forever Home
Once you are established as a unit, you may find yourself thinking more and more about purchasing a home and really starting your lives together! Once I got married, my husband and I started taking our finances more seriously, setting more concrete goals, and working toward getting ourselves in a position to buy a home.
Romantic Highs and Lows
Time to get serious! When you have been together for a long time (not just married) you may find that your relationship goes through highs and lows romantically. When you get more comfortable with each other, your lives get more busy, and you are settled into the relationship, you may find that it takes a little more work to keep the "spark" alive. It becomes SO important to take time to go on dates, even if you have to literally schedule them out, and set aside time to just be with each other. Just because you put a ring on it doesn't mean you can both stop trying to impress each other and show your affection.
The Realization that this is Forever
Again, my husband and I were together for YEARS (7 to be exact) before we became a married couple, but once you take that step and fully commit to one another, your relationship changes dramatically. I have never felt closer to my husband, and I have this renewed dedication to him that came with becoming legally bound. Being married is such an amazing thing, and being able to count on one person through thick or thin is indescribable. Keep this in mind when things get tough, or when you disagree on certain lifestyle choices! You committed for a reason, and you need to work every day to let that person know you are still committed.
What milestones did YOU reach in your first year of marriage? Comment below, I'd love to hear from you!
